To Be or Not to Be:A Personal Reflection

To be or not to be ; that’s what Shakespeare said, didn’t he?

And if I’m honest, I don’t think I have the capacity within me to fully grasp the depths of what those words are meant to reveal. They feel like a question meant for someone else, someone with more clarity, more courage.

But as I sit here and reflect on everything happening around me, I realize that not to be feels like the better choice. It’s a decision where the game stops, the odds cease to matter, and everything becomes quiet. In that sense, not to be has a simplicity to it, an escape from the endless competition of existence.

Yet, despite this, we always seem to choose to be. Why is that? Why do we fight so hard to stay? I wonder if it’s fear , the fear of not to be. Maybe it’s evolutionary, a deeply ingrained instinct to keep going, to keep existing. But the more I think about it, the more I feel haunted by the question itself. Choosing to be feels like a reflex, something automatic, yet the weight of it grows heavier the more I consider it.

Tears roll down my face without warning, and I try, desperately, to reason with them. I want to understand why they’re here, why they exist, but my logical mind falls short. It’s incomprehensible, this heaviness, this ache that has no name. So, here I sit, with nothing but a pen in my hand under the cloudy yet dark sky at 1 am, with no stars but a faint glow of the moon behind the clouds. As if writing under such a sky could change something or as if writing could somehow make sense of it all.

It’s odd, isn’t it? Who picks up a pen when grappling with a question as vast as to be or not to be? But maybe I’m that person — someone who finds no reason for the act itself, and yet does it anyway.

And maybe this question, this crying, this moment, it isn’t for the soul. It’s not something to be quietly resolved within me. It’s larger than that. This question is for the world, a reflection of everything that weighs on it and on us.

As someone in my dream once told me:
Some moments are for the soul…
Some moments are for the world…

And this, this is for the world.